Life Lessons: The Importance of Connection starts with us before AI - LEARNING TO CONNECT
Our technological world - AI, social media, streaming content and delivered content depends on connections to thrive – a series of connected algorithms connecting knowledge, friends, and thoughts, but it all starts with the connection we have to one another and whether we bridge and foster those connections. With St. Patrick’s Day upon us I start our discussion of the importance of connection with the Irish proverb, “It is in the shelter of each other that people live.” We are all born into this world connected - physically connected to our mothers, which connection provides us with the necessities of life. The cord is cut and we begin our adventure independently, but we only truly evolve and thrive when we recognize that we are all connected to everyone and everything around us. It is only when we connect with our world, environment, and all humankind that we truly understand our place in the world, our power to create a positive impact. It is only as we connect that we get to experience the greatness of living – love, accomplishment, success, laughter, happiness, and so much more.
Nothing is attainable or accomplished alone – we are dependent upon one another and this world for survival and success. We connect with the world in which we live, we connect with our parents and family to understand ourselves better, we connect with the air we breathe, and we connect to our peers and mentors to reach our goals. We do not walk through this life alone, we cannot accomplish our life’s purpose and greatness alone, we cannot love alone – we must CONNECT.
Life is a series of connections, and honing those connections in personal and professional endeavors, and yet ask yourself if you have been taught how to connect. Think about who you connect with, are connected to, desire to connect with. Which connections bring you joy, love, growth, wealth - which bring you pain, sorrow or self-sabotage? Which connections seek to uplift and elevate and which bring you down? The more connections we make for ourselves and others the greater wealth, health and happiness for us all.
So why do we find that so often people are stingy with their connections? If my connection makes you more money than me - wow what an impact I have made, and if you believe in karma then it all comes back to you anyway. What prevents us from making and using connections? - Fear and jealousy are the impediments - neither of which serve us. The greatest divider and source of competition is the fiction of lack and limitation. We have shared goals, desires and wants so why not share connections that help us all attain our goals?
It is clear that so many aspects of our lives are dependent upon our connections. Connections for love - how many love stories have you heard about that were made by a connection and introductions? How many successful careers hinged on a door being opened, an awareness of an opportunity, a resume being pushed through by a connection – a connection of a person, feeling, experience or commonality? Nothing happens singularly – nothing! I challenge you to name a famous person, successful business, impactful discovery that hasn’t been attained in collaboration - all are dependent upon connections- so how do we best share them and celebrate them?
It is no surprise that science, the science of well-being, and positive psychology, support the finding that CONNECTION and relationships are a key and vital part of thriving in the world in which we are a part – a source of happiness, a basis of honing optimism, and a foundation from which to grow. The power of connection does not just sit with the receiver, but the power, the happiness and the scientific benefit is proven to sit with the giver as well.
I invite you to join me on this journey of connection and self-awakening – connecting to self, others and your surroundings. What does it mean to be connected? Why is connection so important? You have often heard, do unto others as you would have done to you, as we are all connected. You want to receive kindness, you need to give kindness, you want respect, give respect, you want grace, give grace, you want understanding, give understanding, you want faith and a chance then give faith and a chance. The human experience however is often wrought with detachment, feelings of loneliness, self-pity, being left alone with your thoughts and feelings, often being told by others, societal systems, and constructs to figure it out on your own, and uninformed interpretation of the world grounded in unfounded fear and lack causing harm and pain. It is in separation, disassociations, detachment, ego-centric thinking infusing you with the idea that you and you alone can be the single cause of success or failure, which is the root of pain, failure, devastation, war, anger, hurt, jealousy, revenge, murder, and so much more of the negative aspects and the suffering of the human experience.
Alternatively, when we are connected, truly connected with our selves, one another, and the world, then we recognize that our actions are an extension of intertwined and intermingled connections and actions of people, institutions, social and cultural constructs, and the systems in which we were raised. So, if we wouldn’t be who we are without such connections, then it is important that we recognize our role as a connection in someone else’s life and story.
Think about your own life and those who held the door open to success, happiness, love, acceptance – those persons, whether, stranger, colleague, mentor, boss, friend, or family, who when thought about make you smile, because they connected you with something positive in your life – access to attain a goal, access to an opportunity, or access to support, whatever it may be. Then think about those people who have been part of your journey who have closed a door, caused you to doubt, fear, struggle. In each interaction each person had a choice to either be a positive or negative force in your life, a connector, a bridge to your highest achievements and highest self, or a separator and detractor to diminish your efforts. We must contemplate on a daily basis, in every action we take, do we want to be the person who extends equity, kindness, inclusion, acceptance, power and connection, or do we want to be the separator, oppressor, the person whose actions feeds limitation, loneliness and lack? This week do one thing to foster a connection as the giver and be prepared to witness and feel the greatness you receive!!
Melissa Hope Orlen Cohen is a sociologist, corporate and entertainment attorney, transformational executive coach and mother of two college-age sons who works with many to empower, and teach how to connect to yourself, each other and the world that surrounds – once we connect all is possible. For more information visit www.onceweconnect.com.
